Loaded

Two guys, involved in an ongoing intergenerational hook-up, face off on gay hot button issues during an apparently rare hour on rather than under the sheets. Given the very real generational chasm in gay urban culture, there should be more interesting material in this premise than the first-time playwright finds: he's more written (half-naked) mouthpieces than people. Worse, he hasn't written a fair fight: everytime the older guy makes a point or two the playwright is quick to put the character in his place by giving him some repellent bit of business. (Sometimes not only repellent but irresponsible: as the character made a display of his prejudice against lesbians, generally depicting them as troublemakers who hindered rather than helped AIDS efforts, I was horrified to realize that an otherwise uninformed person could take this for fact.) The characters are so strategically, unsurprisingly opposed on every talking point that there is no credible reason why they wouldn't stop talking and either end the evening or take it back to bed. The actors (I saw able understudies Rik Walter and Joel T. Bauer) do quite a lot to fix this huge credibility lapse by signaling attraction and by trying for levels, but they've been asked to breathe life into cardboard.

The Barber of Seville

The staff at the new Bleecker Street Opera seemed unprepared for the full house. Everything was a little disorganized, and the show started late. The Rosina (Malena Dayen) was recovering from bronchitis. The Bartolo was a last-minute substitute who needed line cues from conductor/music director David Rosenmeyer. Mr. Rosenmeyer himself had been a late addition to the team after the unexpected departure of Paul Haas. And with all that, what did we get? Not technical perfection, it's true, but a thoroughly enjoyable and in some respects exceptional production, thanks to the cast of superb singers, the hardworking Mr. Rosenmeyer and his mini-orchestra, and a talented production team led by stage director Teresa K. Pond. William Browning was a simply glorious Figaro. Read the full review.

1. The Understudy

Photo/Sara Krulwich

Underwhelming. Theresa Rebeck satirizes the profound "art" of theater by creating something that is far from profound, and in which her actors--Justin Kirk, Julie White, and Mark-Paul Gosselar--can basically play themselves. It's tongue-in-cheek because it uses a rehearsal for an "undiscovered" Kafka play to represents the Kafkaesque nature of being the understudy of an understudy in a world in which audiences won't see shows unless there are stars in it. And though it's hard to resist Kirk's passionate appeal for just doing the work, or Gosselar's discovery that performance can be deeper than a line reading, the readiness is not all. Unless you're trying to be artificial, and White's about the only person who makes that whip-snappingly worthwhile.

I Just Didn't Get It

God of Carnage
Photo: Joan Marcus

My last entry of the year (Happy New Year, everyone!) lists shows that received raves and/or were big hits, and I don't understand why.

Streetcar Named Desire: Full of itself, hammy, overblown, dumb. Cate Blanchett chewed the ugly scenery.

Our Town: While I didn't find it bad enough to make my "worst shows" list, it was, uh, boring.

God of Carnage: Not one of the four characters was remotely believable, and the show's reach for significance fell far short. (And if she was that nauseated, she would have gone into the bathroom, you know?)

Orphan's Home Cycle: I made it through 5/9ths of this before giving up. I found it wordy, slow, and (with a few exceptions) unexcitingly acted.

The Norman Conquests: Who cares? I sure didn't.

Five Worst Shows of 2009

Desire Under the Elms
Photo: Liz Lauren

This list is easy--these five shows were squirmingly wretched:

(In reverse alphabetical order.)

• West Side Story: A breath-taking example of how to direct the life out of a show.
• Loaded: Completely lacking wit, drama, believability, or a reason to exist.
• Impressionism: Bafflingly bad on every level. Confusing plot, bad acting by good actors, dumb premise.
• Hedda Gabler (with Mary Louise Parker): What were they thinking?
• Desire Under the Elms: Not only the worst show I saw this year, but one of the very worst I've seen in 40 years of play-going. Stultifying, pompous, and excruciating.

2009's 5 Worst

I wasn't planning on publishing my worst list, but since Wendy posted hers, I see no harm in following suit. Again, a lot of easy decisions here.

1. Our Town
This year, the emperor's new clothes were an ill-fitting flannel, beat-up jeans and a cell phone. And while bacon was frying mere feet away from me, all I could smell was corn.

2. The Starry Messenger
Star Matthew Broderick didn't know his lines, first-time director Kenneth Lonergan had no idea how to present his own text, and the result was a three-plus hour trainwreck with no plot and no guidance.

3. Desire Under the Elms
What happens when you combine a Tony Award winning director (Robert Falls), arguably the best Eugene O'Neill interpreter alive (Brian Dennehy) and one of the strongest actresses of her generation (Carla Gugino)? Not much, as evidenced by this streamlined, anachronistic production that opened and closed quickly in May.

4. West Side Story
How do you say "misfire" in Spanish?

5. The Bacchae
Jonathan Groff is usually wonderful, but as the vicious and sexually voracious demi-god Dionysus? I think not.

photo: The cast of Our Town at The Barrow Street Theatre. Credit: Joan Marcus.